Welcome to the Valentine's Day edition of Don't Be Bitter. Bouquets of imported flowers, heart-shaped balloons with cursive writing on them, cartons of nougat-filled chocolate, smiling stuffed animals clutching plush hearts, $4.99 bedazzled greeting cards expressing sentiments that compensate for the lack of originality... It's impossible to ignore that V-Day has once again graced us with its presence. This day dedicated especially to love is perhaps one of the most divisive secular holidays we have. It's more than political; it's personal.

If you don't have a Valentine, do NOT be that person who complains about how Valentine's Day is stupid, cliche, and commercial. Your bitterness and inability to be happy for others will only make it painfully obvious to the world why you are single in the first place. And who knows? You could be scaring away any secret admirer you may have.

If you do have a Valentine [you lucky duck, you!], don't make the mistake of appearing too happy in front of your single pals. Cut them some slack. I mean, there's no harm in celebrating what you and your oh-so-special-someone have together. But... try to be sensitive to your friends who may be less fortunate in the love department. And avoid false sympathy with an offhand remark like, "Yeah, he left me a box of chocolates and a handmade card on my doorstep this morning, and we're going out to dinner tonight at that place that requires making a reservation six months in advance, but it's no big deal. You're way better off single!"

With that tongue-in-cheek intro, I'd like to proclaim [if anyone cares] that I happily park myself in the pro-Valentine's Day camp. Year after dateless year, I can't shake off this awful optimism. I take a guilty pleasure in watching sweethearts shyly holding hands for the first time, people taking out their wallets at sidewalk flower shops to buy a bouquet of carnations, teenage boys walking out of stores with giant pink teddy bears and enough balloons to lift a house [pardon the Up reference]. These stolen little snapshots of people's lives represent the best of Valentine's Day: friendship, love, hope.

In honor of the universal cheesiness of February 14th, I suppose my stance on this whole love day thing can be expressed through a Meg Ryan quote from You've Got Mail:

Frank: What about you? Is there someone else?
Kathleen: No. No... but there's the dream of someone else.