Thoughts of a 20-Something
THE 20S ARE LIKE the stem cell of human development, the pluripotent moment when any of several outcomes is possible. Decisions and actions during this time have lasting ramifications. The 20s are when most people accumulate almost all of their formal education; when most people meet their future spouses and the friends they will keep; when most people start on the careers that they will stay with for many years. This is when adventures, experiments, travels, relationships are embarked on with an abandon that probably will not happen again.
- "What is it About 20-Somethings", Robin Marantz Henig for The New York Times
This past August, Robin Marantz Henig wrote an interesting piece for The New York Times called What is it About 20-Somethings? The article takes a fascinating look at a phenomenon that has been developing in American society for the past few years. More and more young adults, many of them recent college grads, seem to wait longer before completing the traditional 'milestones' of adulthood like establishing a career, marrying, buying a house and starting a family. These 20 somethings sometimes move back in with their parents, giving them more time to search for a job, or perhaps work and save money. Others travel the world, volunteer/ intern or apply to grad school.
While some theorists blame the recession, as a 20-something or member of Generation Y, I think it would also be helpful to look at the cultural and historical context. Perhaps we should start by looking at our grandparents' generation, those who matured into adulthood during WWII. This generation prided itself on hardiness and sacrifice. After all, it was what got them through the war. They had to mature quickly and when the war was over, they started their own families. Borne from this were the Baby Boomers who nobly wanted a better life for themselves and a better world for their children. This post-war generation is noted for its interest in social and cultural revolution. Freedom was the call to arms. Freedom in sex, relationships, politics and civic life. It was freedom from what they saw as the 'conformity' or discipline of their parents' wartime generation before them. As with any cultural changes, there are positives and negatives. Maybe out of these changes, grew (to some degree) a sense of entitlement that was passed onto us: Generation Y, also dubbed (or snubbed) by some of our elders as Generation Me.
Piano lessons, extra-curricular activities, study guides... from a young age, many of us (though I recognize not all) have been raised to expect eventual success out of life. We have been exposed to so many ideas, interests and pursuits, that it's almost intoxicating. We're told that, if we work hard and follow the predetermined path of success through high school and college to the workplace, that we can be the brilliant, clever, perfectly charming and successful adults we were meant to be. So, what do we do? We do what we're told. We go to our after-school activities and ace our SATs in high school, we study hard and land rewarding internships in college, graduate with honors and then... what? That's the ultimate question. What's next? According to the traditional road map of success, we have to check off the following boxes: land a dream job, find and marry the love of your life, own a house in the suburbs with 3 bedrooms and 2.5 baths, procreate and shop at Banana Republic. It sounds lovely. But, like the article probes, why are so many of us putting it all off?
I think it's because we can. Those of us who belong to the group targeted by the article have a plethora of options. Why not? We graduate from a reputable institution with a somewhat useful degree and lo and behold-- there are no jobs to be had!!! We discover that the path to our dream job is fraught with numerous footfalls. It's either we're under-qualified or over-qualified. Perhaps we want to go back for some post-grad education, that will require even more money. Perhaps the perfect entry-level position requires us to move to another city or state, which requires money, which requires a job... and we're back to square one. Can you blame us if we consider moving back in with our parents in the meantime just so we can work hard and save up a bit before we venture out on our own? And if we want to pursue a second degree, I imagine it's quite difficult to balance school with the part-time job you'll need to get to pay for rent and your eventual student loans.
Perhaps I feel so passionately about the subject because I can so readily identify with my peers. While I don't condone self-entitled brats who waste hundreds of thousands of dollars of their parents' money on a degree they don't intend to use while they mooch off of their parents for the rest of their lives like overgrown teenagers, I would like to add a word of defense for those of us who actually plan on eventual independence. Although I don't pretend to deserve the advantages and privileges I've been given, I do want to strive at least to be worthy of my parents' generosity by making it on my own one day. Until then, I'm afraid I must continue relying on those who have helped me all along. Like Henig acknowledges, sometimes it feels like it's the only way we can achieve the dreams we were taught to build. What are your thoughts?
- "What is it About 20-Somethings", Robin Marantz Henig for The New York Times
This past August, Robin Marantz Henig wrote an interesting piece for The New York Times called What is it About 20-Somethings? The article takes a fascinating look at a phenomenon that has been developing in American society for the past few years. More and more young adults, many of them recent college grads, seem to wait longer before completing the traditional 'milestones' of adulthood like establishing a career, marrying, buying a house and starting a family. These 20 somethings sometimes move back in with their parents, giving them more time to search for a job, or perhaps work and save money. Others travel the world, volunteer/ intern or apply to grad school.
While some theorists blame the recession, as a 20-something or member of Generation Y, I think it would also be helpful to look at the cultural and historical context. Perhaps we should start by looking at our grandparents' generation, those who matured into adulthood during WWII. This generation prided itself on hardiness and sacrifice. After all, it was what got them through the war. They had to mature quickly and when the war was over, they started their own families. Borne from this were the Baby Boomers who nobly wanted a better life for themselves and a better world for their children. This post-war generation is noted for its interest in social and cultural revolution. Freedom was the call to arms. Freedom in sex, relationships, politics and civic life. It was freedom from what they saw as the 'conformity' or discipline of their parents' wartime generation before them. As with any cultural changes, there are positives and negatives. Maybe out of these changes, grew (to some degree) a sense of entitlement that was passed onto us: Generation Y, also dubbed (or snubbed) by some of our elders as Generation Me.
Piano lessons, extra-curricular activities, study guides... from a young age, many of us (though I recognize not all) have been raised to expect eventual success out of life. We have been exposed to so many ideas, interests and pursuits, that it's almost intoxicating. We're told that, if we work hard and follow the predetermined path of success through high school and college to the workplace, that we can be the brilliant, clever, perfectly charming and successful adults we were meant to be. So, what do we do? We do what we're told. We go to our after-school activities and ace our SATs in high school, we study hard and land rewarding internships in college, graduate with honors and then... what? That's the ultimate question. What's next? According to the traditional road map of success, we have to check off the following boxes: land a dream job, find and marry the love of your life, own a house in the suburbs with 3 bedrooms and 2.5 baths, procreate and shop at Banana Republic. It sounds lovely. But, like the article probes, why are so many of us putting it all off?
I think it's because we can. Those of us who belong to the group targeted by the article have a plethora of options. Why not? We graduate from a reputable institution with a somewhat useful degree and lo and behold-- there are no jobs to be had!!! We discover that the path to our dream job is fraught with numerous footfalls. It's either we're under-qualified or over-qualified. Perhaps we want to go back for some post-grad education, that will require even more money. Perhaps the perfect entry-level position requires us to move to another city or state, which requires money, which requires a job... and we're back to square one. Can you blame us if we consider moving back in with our parents in the meantime just so we can work hard and save up a bit before we venture out on our own? And if we want to pursue a second degree, I imagine it's quite difficult to balance school with the part-time job you'll need to get to pay for rent and your eventual student loans.
Perhaps I feel so passionately about the subject because I can so readily identify with my peers. While I don't condone self-entitled brats who waste hundreds of thousands of dollars of their parents' money on a degree they don't intend to use while they mooch off of their parents for the rest of their lives like overgrown teenagers, I would like to add a word of defense for those of us who actually plan on eventual independence. Although I don't pretend to deserve the advantages and privileges I've been given, I do want to strive at least to be worthy of my parents' generosity by making it on my own one day. Until then, I'm afraid I must continue relying on those who have helped me all along. Like Henig acknowledges, sometimes it feels like it's the only way we can achieve the dreams we were taught to build. What are your thoughts?